When you were born…

The things I wish I could someday share with my little one about his birth day.  I only got one day with him, and he only got one birth day on earth with us.  We had to make a lifetime of memories with him in a few hours, because that’s all we could have with him outside of the womb.

The day before you were born…

…your parents packed your hospital bag—the “baby bag.”  Your mother wanted to make sure it was ready to go in case we needed it early.

…the nurse at the hospital told your mother that her contractions were normal and would not make any progress.

…your parents finally finished watching a video on labour and delivery and your daddy saw a childbirth (on video) for the first time.  It must have inspired you to come early.

…your parents had dinner with friends and discussed your upcoming birth, scheduled for the week after.

…your mother insisted on getting a haircut since there wouldn’t be time to between then and your birth (which was supposed to be the week after) and didn’t want long hair to interfere with your delivery.

…the doctor at the hospital told your mother that the contractions were false labour and were not making any progress and sent us home late that night.


On the day you were born…

…the hospital and the doctor on call both told your mother to not come back in because there was no way the contractions were going to bring you into the world that day.

…your mother was supposed to have an appointment with the OB in our hometown to discuss the plans for your birth in the big city the upcoming week.

…before anyone else knew you were going to come, not even the doctors, the abbess from the nearby monastery who had been praying for you for so many months prayed for you who were going to be born that day during early morning services.  You were so special to so many people who never got to meet you.

…your daddy had to rush back home from the third visit to the hospital in less than 24 hours to pack things for our trip to the other hospital for your birth.

…the weather was so bad that the mountain passes were closed so no cars could get to the hospital where you needed to be born three hours away.

…the weather was so bad that the helicopter could not fly the distance to the hospital where you needed to be born.

…you traveled with your parents by two ambulances and a small plane to get to the hospital where you needed to be born.

…the weather in the big city was dreary and rainy as usual until a few minutes before you were born when the sun came out and lit the room with natural light.

…you were so strong that your heartbeat never wavered, even after hours of labour without amnioinfusion, and even when your mama’s blood pressure plummeted to 80/40.

…you were so ready to be born that the doctors almost had to run to make it in time to greet you.

…you were welcomed into the world by 17 doctors and nurses, ready to help you breathe.

…your daddy baptised you because we did not know how much longer you would be with us.

…your parents loved and held you as long as we were allowed to before your little heartbeat finally stopped.  You were beautiful, calm, and sweet every minute.  You only cried a little bit at first.  We wished we could have heard you cry more but your lungs were too weak.

…you were greeted into heaven by the angels and the saints.

…the priest from the church in our hometown was stranded in the big city by the weather and came to the hospital to pray for your soul as it swiftly left your small, beautiful body.

…we wept because we missed you, though we were thankful for the almost-eight-months you spent with us in my womb, and the five hours you were with us in the world.  We wanted you to know how well loved you were and always will be.  We hope you felt the love around you as you took your last difficult breaths and your strong, defiant heartbeat finally faded away.


One thought on “When you were born…

  1. What a beautiful tribute. Your little Seraphim will always be remembered by me as my little Mabel’s companion. May they find each other and share their stories. Your journey has helped me through mine and I hope you continue to write and share. Wishing you strength and comfort during this time.

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